I've always liked the way tumblr looks... I just don't want to use both at the moment, I feel like I would have to update both. I've had this longer and have stuff since freshman year so y'know I would kind of feel bad not using it anymore. I feel like tumblr is much easier to use and I like how it looks simple. Major plus. However, I feel like I should just use this because I could write long entries (whether you see it or not) and I feel like lj is more fit for that... Well that was pointless, but I thought about it. Haha.

Thursdays are amazing, because they are the "Fridays" of summer school. After class, I went to Jeff's where Ochoa and Jeff looked at my pink cruiser bike and helped me fix it a little. Afterwards I baked a test cake. I've been watching Ace of Cakes and Cake Boss on TV alot lately... I guess you can say that I am a bit inspired. My sisters' birthdays are coming up next month and I'd like to bake a cake so I want to make one (plus icing) from scratch. I became interested to play with fondant but didn't want to buy commercial fondant since I heard it taste like play dough. Today, I just baked a box cake, made frosting from scratch, and made fondant for the first time. I just wanted to see where I would mess up on and what I can do to improve for the next cake.

Let's see:
1. Yes on the white buttercream frosting. Add a few more tablespoons of milk to the ingredients and it's good.
2. Wait longer on the cake as it cools... oh, cut uneven parts nicely next time.
3. Buy a spinning cake stand.
4. Use LESS shortening while making fondant. I used too much that it ruined everything. I couldn't roll smoothly, the shininess of the grease ruined the matte look of the fondant, and it was just too difficult to play with. The fondant was just not smooth. I was going to throw it away, but didn't. So I basically gave up.

( more, more, more. )
btw- sorry if I have been a bit unresponsive lately. I'm always doing something and when I'm not I am just trying to breathe, or stay awake.

 

Sometimes I wish I had more free time, sometimes I wish I had no free time. Are we truly satisfied? Haha.

It's time for that summer to-do list I've been meaning to write...

This summer:

• bake more. pretty cakes and cupcakes.
• learn how to cook for next year!
• finish the photo albums.
• play with my camera more.
• maybe get a job.
• finish my summer school classes.
• oh, find furniture for my apartment... possible craft projects?
• make more things, diy.

That's all I could think of, but honestly I don't think I will be able to finish it. Sigh.

Tomorrow is Monday which means back to school mode again... I have two tests. Sigh.

Last Friday was Matt Butler's funeral. I met Matt back in middle school and graduated high school with him. Late Sunday night/early Monday morning, I found out that he passed away a few hours before. He got shot and honestly, it came as a surprise to me and I wondered how and why that happened... We were never close friends and we would only talk in the classes that we had. I remembered him as a silly, fun guy and he always had that Matt smile. He was always so upbeat and positive whenever I was around him... The next morning, I read in the news that they found him in his car with multiple gun shots. Some kids planned to rob him of his marijuana (because he sold a little bit) and when he fought those kids back, they shot him. They murdered a guy for $50 worth of marijuana, seriously?! When I found out, it made me so angry and frustrated. I can't believe these people. Antioch used to be a nice suburban town. When I moved here 10 years ago, the nice part of Antioch were VERY nice... the houses grew to cost more than a million, and then it all went downhill. People from Oakland and Richmond started moving in and crime rates went up. You can't even bike or walk outside without the fear of getting jumped or robbed. It sucks. I fear for the safety of my family & friends. I know these kinds of things happen everywhere, but I'm pretty sure that some places have lower crime rates than this town. You hear all these stories about violence but when it happens to someone you know, it really is different. Anyway. The comments people made about Matt's news article pissed me off even more. It's so upsetting. I know that my friends' parents also made comments saying that "I feel no sympathy for that kid that died, he got himself into that mess and he got shot for it. His fault." Some people are so fucking narrow minded. It's true that if Matt didn't sell, he wouldn't have been involved in this mess.. but for people to say that they have no sympathy for him and he deserved it? What the hell? He made a mistake but it does not mean that he deserved to die, he did not deserve to lose his life because of some greedy wanna be gangsters. No one deserves to get murdered... Those kids had planned to steal, to murder, and Matt would never go out to kill. He went to school, had goals, and worked the 4:00AM shift at Starbucks, doesn't that say that he at least worked and wasn't like those low-life bastards that planned to get something for free? I also hate how they call him a drug dealer. Although he sold (and however small it was), it still makes him one but honestly I don't see him as that. I'll never remember him as that. When some people read the word marijuana in the news, they freak out and see it as a really bad thing. Just because he smoked (or anyone) doesn't mean they should die and go to hell for it. Yeah, it's illegal... so is underage drinking, by why is underage drinking more acceptable to society than smoking weed? Think whatever you want to think-- if you think that weed is a harmful drug then do so.. whatever. Cigarettes are too, they're legal. Alcohol ruins your body, they're legal. Some of the people I know smoke and although I'm not a big fan of it, I'm not gonna judge them and label them a bad person... if I ever dislike them, it would be because of some other reason. When people smoke and drink all the time, sit in their ass all day, and have no future goals... yeah, I think it's pathetic. Go do something with your life. Anyway, sorry for the rant. They are just my opinion, if yours are different, great. This whole thing just got me thinking. I went to the candle lit memorial at Williamson Ranch Park a few hours after Matt died. There were about 300 people that paid their respects... damn, it was really really sad. I couldn't stop thinking about it all week. It was nice to hear stories told about him during the funeral, there were a lot of people... his manager spoke, people from Starbucks that he made coffee for went, his best friends... I mostly hurt for his family and close friends. It's just really sad how his family have to deal with what people are saying and everything. It's true... the order of life, it's not supposed to be parents or grandparents burying their children. When you're 19, you're supposed to be worrying about starting your career, doing fun shit, wondering who you'll fall in love with, wondering when you will start a family, growing old, etc... not dead. I don't think that anything can ever replace that loss. If I picture myself in that situation, I don't know what I would do. I'd just die. At the funeral, it was really apparent that he made an impact in the lives of those who knew him, he really won't be forgotten. Matt is in a better place now, rest in peace. 

This writing everyday thing is not working out! Blame it on summer school... and catching up. When I don't get 8 hours of sleep, it's all bad. I spent this weekend in San Francisco at the Athens' girls apartment. Anna was the lovely host, so thank you very much for letting us stay. We walked around the city and on Saturday, we went to warped tour at the pier. I have a picture blog to post next time... actually, I haven't been posting any picture blogs up because they're all up on facebook and that is faster. It's always really nice to go back a few blogs and look at pictures or whatever I wrote. I did that the other day... weird how things change so much/so little. I still haven't written a blog about what I want to get done this summer and I hope that I do that next time I write here. I think that I am not going to make any plans this weekend and just stay home. I am in a mood to do just relax by making something/d.i.y/anything crafty. I can never really stick with that being crafty plan because it can get pricey and it can never really be a priority for me since I have school and stuff. I need to get better with this time management thing... 

Anna has a nice view of city lights from her street... she lives on a hilly San Francisco street, it's quite a bitch to walk to be honest.

Anyway, I am wishing that I lived in a nicer town. I don't think that it's just me, but over the years this place has gotten really lame. I know that bad things happen everywhere but it has gotten worse here. It's just sad to hear bad things happen to people you know from school or wherever.

I first heard this song yesterday when I was driving to school. Got a free 09 Warped Tour compilation along with my ticket... At first the beat got me and it's been on replay ever since. Summer school has taken over my life and I actually don't mind it. What else am I going to do? Might as well learn some calculus and Mandarin. I don't really care for my social life right now. I can't focus on that. Random but I want a new livejournal layout so watch out for that. I want to write a blog but that's going to have to wait... I have something on my mind and I definitely will write if I have free time on the weekend. Unfortunately, imeem can't play the whole song unless you click on the link... sigh.


"Please don't forget me, I'm going away.. I'm taking a taxi to Kentucky where they don't need to know all about me, I'm going away. I'm going my way. Finally it's my time to be lonely, and lost, unloved and I can't wait. Don't forget what I said, don't forget my letter. 

But he said "slow down, slow down think it over, we've all got wretched closets silly girl, pride kills more than aids 
lately" I said "come on I've thought it over, I don't wanna die here I have no desire to get married" 

I can't race the others anymore, 
no, I must learn to race myself."

 Even in dreams. Can't get away. 

Oh, one year ago I graduated from highschool. June 13 on a Friday! I thought I was going to cry, but honestly, I was so ready to leave. Crazy how time flies...

Summer is eh. I have no motivation to do anything. What am I talking about? It's only day two. All I feel like doing is stay home and sleep as much as I can. I played Sims 3 for an hour or two. I am starting summer school soon. I have chinese 120 (level 1) from 8:15AM-11:45AM at DVC and then calc (math 16/21a) from 1-3:50pm at LMC. Blah. My little sister is supposed to be taking chinese with me, but I don't know anymore since she's still in high school & she can't register til the day of the class... well the class has 5 people waitlisted already! What the fuck? I am just going to stress about that when Monday comes.

I used to think that sleep was a waste of time (I still believe that) but lately I have been loving it. I think I am going to sleep soon... it's only 10:49PM, but gradually I have been sleeping earlier and earlier (from 3AM to 1...to hopefully 12, maybe 11?) Tomorrow I am going to go job hunting with Amy. I don't really feel like working this summer since I have two summer courses but I need the money! Gah... It will be a nice catch up. Today Xiao and Stephanie from Davis texted me out of the blue... Bobby from high school and I had a random chat. These random texts are nice. I feel sortof bad not going to Jordan's birthday thing tonight but I have been unpacking, organizing, cleaning my stuff all day and figuring shit out plus I have a fat ass headache. I will gain my "hanging out mode" later... for now I am just mentally and physically tired, I just want some time alone I guess.

Well, this summer I want to work on improving some things. There's always room for improvement and to accomplish that would really satisfy me. 

Man, I wish I could just use tumblr. It's more aesthetically pleasing. It's better for posting simple things. To my friends that use blogspot or tumblr... just to let you guys know, I still read your blog daily. Even if I cannot reply. Oh, to those that read this that don't use a livejournal, comment one of my entries using "OpenID" so I can add you as a friend (then, you can read my friends only entries). I've already done this with Panini and Leanne I think. Haha.

I think I should stop writing now since I plan on writing here almost daily. Maybe mostly friends only entries. I want to get my thoughts & feelings together more. Like old times.

❝If a guy treats you like he doesn't give a shit, it's because he doesn't give a shit.❞ -Alex, from He's Just Not That Into You

True that. I really like this movie right now. Reality check.

I thought that this was such a fun idea. I left Davis this afternoon for an appointment here and I am coming back tomorrow afternoon (actually... in a few hours). This weekend is UC Davis' Whole Earth Festival... it's pretty legit! I checked it out with Alli this morning and we both bought our moms a honey/beeswax candle that's shaped like a lotus flower. It was really cute. I want to try the thai iced tea popsicle tomorrow and get some peace pendants from that guy that gives it away... 

I posted earlier today already but I saw this in Kelly's tumblr and I am in love!

❝And it's bad news, baby I'm bad news. Baby, you're bad news and you're bad news. I don't care, I like you.❞ -Portions For Foxes, Rilo Kiley

❝There is no failure except in no longer trying.❞ -Elbert Hubbard

I try, you don't.

This is so cute! I found this cute sleeping bag thing via Kelly's Tumblr. Awww I want one.

❝If you truly do believe in something, somehow it all works out.❞ -Can't Finish What You Started, Motion City Soundtrack

I need to start believing... in myself, in other things... they can be done.

Reading for IR (International Relations) just never ends! That's what I get for adding that class later I guess... it's just tons of reading and I hate going to the 10:30AM lecture every Tuesday and Thursday. It's an interesting class though... last midterm til the 23rd... ahh I'm so nervous. Time to get back to work. I don't blog as much as I'd like... sigh.